The Number of The Beast: WWW

The Number of The Beast: WWW

These descriptions assume a few things about biblical predictions:

1) They are describing future events from the point of view of someone in the past

2) The closer we get to these predictions the easier it should be to see what they really meant


The most fascinating & most quoted prediction tells of how to identify the beast:

Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is Six hundred threescore and six.

The manuscripts of the New Testament were written in Ancient Koine [common] Greek, or have been accurately translated from those Greek manuscripts into other languages.

If we try to look at different ways this numeral could be written:

χξς  or χις [1]

or

έξι έξι έξι [2]

None of these forms look similar to anything in modern times. But if we look at Roman numerals we get:

VI VI VI [3]

Now if we assume this person from the past is trying to describe something it is seeing from our point of view then this could be:



Thus the closest description of WWW (the world wide web) for someone in the past is V/V/V/ or VI VI VI. 

Of course this alone is a long reach but if we read what's before then it makes more sense:

15 And he had power to give life unto the image of the beast, that the image of the beast should both speak, and cause that as many as would not worship the image of the beast should be killed.
16 And he causeth all, both small and great, rich and poor, free and bond, to receive a mark in their right hand, or in their foreheads:
17 And that no man might buy or sell, save he that had the mark, or the name of the beast, or the number of his name. [4]

So the image of the beast can speak.  The closest thing that can speak and is connected to the web are devices like Siri, Cortana, Google Assistant and Alexa

These devices are merely images though, so what we can expect is a more powerful AI device to be behind them.  Maybe its address will be just "www".

Apparently in the future these devices will require a mark on the right hand or on the forehead to buy and sell.  Which is already being tried in Sweden and by a company in Wisconsin, USA

Digital money would be the only way to enforce this setup and this too is also being explored in India

So there you have it, AI is the beast and the bible does agree with Elon Musk and Stephen Hawking.  Perhaps it's time to listen!

Red Tide:

Another prediction that could be around the corner:


This has happened in small scale in Florida, USA and was called a red tide.


Thanks for reading!


In The Theater


The Poopie List

Ghost Poopie - The kind where you feel the poopie
come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.

Clean Poopie - The kind where you poopie it out,
see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the
toilet paper.

Wet Poopie - The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and still feels unwiped, so you have to put
some toilet paper between your butt and your
underwear, so you won't ruin them with a stain.

Second Wave Poopie - This happens when you're done poopieing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees and you realize that you have to poopie some more.

Pop-A-Vein-In-Your-Forehead-Poopie - The kind were you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.

Lincoln Log Poopie - The kind of poopie that is so
huge, your afraid to flush without first breaking
it into little pieces with the toilet brush.

Gassy Poopie - It's so noisy, everyone within
earshot is giggling.

Corn Poopie - Self explanatory.

Gee-I-Wish-I-Could-Poopie-Poopie - The kind where you want to poopie, but all you do is sit on the toilet & fart a few times.

Spinal Tap Poopie - That's where it hurts so badly
coming out, you'd swear it was leaving sideways.

Wet Cheeks Poopie - (The power dump) The kind that comes out of your butt so fast, your cheeks get
splashed with water.

Liquid Poopie - The kind where yellowish-brown
liquid shoots out of your butt and splashes all over the toilet bowl.

Mexican Poopie - It smells so bad your nose burns.

Upper Class Poopie - The kind of poopie that doesn't smell.

The Suprise Poopie - You are not even at the toilet
because you are sure your about to fart, but
OOPS!- a poopie!

The Dangling Poopie - This poopie refuses to drop
into the toilet even though you know you are done
poopieing. You just pray that a shake or two will
cut it loose.

12 Quick Jokes

1. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

2. A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "Sorry, we don't serve food in here."

3. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

4. Two antennas walk into a bar, fall in love, get married. The ceremony wasn't much but the reception was great.

5. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

6. Two cows walk into a bar, Daisy cow says to Dolly cow:
"I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," said Dolly.
"It's true, no bull!", exclaimed Daisy.

7. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."

8. A bull walks into a bar and the bartender gets a Deja Moo: The feeling he's heard this bull before.

9. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?"
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him"

So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says:
"I'm going to have to put him down."
"What!!??, because he's cross-eyed???"
"No, because he's really heavy."


10. An invisible man walks into a bar and meets an invisible woman.  They get married. The kids were nothing to look at either.

11. What do you call a fish with no eyes?  A fsh.

12. What did the ocean say to the beach?  Nothing, he just waved.

Math and Women


Marketing in female terms

People often ask for an explanation of "Marketing." Well, here it is:

You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him
and say

"I'm fantastic in bed."

That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One
of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says

"She's fantastic in bed."

That's Advertising.

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his
telephone number. The next day you call and say

"Hi, I'm fantastic in bed,"

That's Telemarketing.

You see a guy at a party, you straighten your dress. You walk up to him
and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his
tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say,

"By the way, I'm fantastic in bed."

That's Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says

"I hear you're fantastic in bed"

That's Brand Recognition.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk
him into going home with your friend.

That's a Sales Rep.

Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.

That's Tech Support.

You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be
handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof
of one situated towards the center and shout at the top of your lungs

"I'm fantastic in bed!"

That's Junk Mail.

Two Italian Immigrants


A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit

down and engage in an animated conversation.
The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first,
but her attention is galvanized when she hears
one of the men say the following:

"Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more.
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time."

"You foul-mouthed swine", retorted the lady indignantly.
"In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"

"Hey, coola down lady". said the man.
"Who talkin' abouta sexa?"
'I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella "Mississippi".'

BET YA READ IT TWICE!!

Pantyhose

Question: How many animals can you fit into a pair of Pantyhose???

Answer: 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 ass, 1 beaver, an unknown number of hares, possibly some crabs, and a fish no one can find.

Poor Skippy

  A woman goes to her boyfriends' parents' house for dinner. This is to be her first time meeting the family, and she is very nervous.  They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water.  Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart.


  It wasn't loud, but everyone at the table heard the poof.  Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend's father looked over at the dog which had been snoozing at the woman's feet and said in a rather stern voice:

"Skippy!"

The woman thought, "This is great!" and a big smile came across her face. A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again.  This time, she didn't even hesitate.  She let a much louder and longer fart rip.  The father again looked at the dog and yelled:

"Dammit Skippy!"

Once again the woman smiled and thought "Yes!".  A few minutes later, the woman had to let another one rip.  This time, she didn't even think about it.  She let rip a fart that rivaled a train whistle blowing. Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled:


"Dammit Skippy, get away from her before she shits on you!"

A Manager & An Engineer

A man flying in a hot-air balloon realized he was lost.  He spotted a man on the ground and reduced altitude until he was within shouting range.

"Excuse me," he shouted, "Can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago but I don't know where I am."
 
The man below responded, "Yes, you are in a hot-air balloon, hovering approximately thirty feet above me.  You are between 51 and 52 degrees North latitude and between 0 and 1 degrees West longitude."
 
"You must be an engineer," responded the balloonist.
 
"I am," the man replied, "How did you know?"
 
"Well," said the balloonist, "Everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information and the fact is I am still lost."
 
Whereupon the man on the ground responded, "You must be a manager."
 
"That I am," replied the balloonist, "But how did you know?"
 
"Well," said the man, "You don't know where you are, or where you are going.  You have made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem.  The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."

Never swear at Mom

Two brothers, one five years old and the other 4 years old, were talking upstairs in their bedroom.....


"You know what?" says the 5 year old,
"I think it's about time we start swearing."

The 4 year old nods his head in approval.

"When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna say 'hell' and you say 'ass' OK?"

"OK!" the 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.

The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 5 year old what he wants for breakfast.

"Ah hell Mom, I guess I'll have some cheerios."

WHACK!! He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up and ran upstairs crying his eyes out. The mother looked at the 4 year old and asked with a stern voice:
"And what do you want for breakfast young man?"

"I don't know", he blubbers, "but you can bet your ass it won't be cheerios."

The Gogh Family

After much careful research, it has been discovered that the artist Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives. Among them were:


His dizzy aunt ........................................Verti Gogh

The brother who ate prunes .................. Gotta Gogh

The constipated uncle ........................... Cant Gogh

The brother who worked at a convenience store ............................................................. Stopn Gogh

The grandfather from Yugoslavia ............... U Gogh

The cousin from Illinois ....................... Chica Gogh

His magician uncle .................... Wherediddy Gogh

His Mexican cousin ............................. Amee Gogh

The American half brother .................... Grin Gogh

The ballroom dancing aunt ..................... Tan Gogh

A sister who loved disco .......................... Go Gogh

The bird lover uncle ........................... Flamin Gogh

His nephew psychoanalyst .......................... E Gogh

The fruit loving cousin ........................... Man Gogh

An aunt who taught positive thinking...Wayto Gogh

The little bouncy nephew ....................... Poe Gogh

And his niece who drives a van... Winnie Bay Gogh

The Compassionate CEO

One afternoon, a wealthy company CEO was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.



"Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man.
"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.
"Oh, come along with me then," instructed the CEO.
"But, sir, I have a wife and two children!"
"Bring them along!" replied the CEO. He turned to the other man and said "Come with us."
"But sir, I have a wife and six children!" the second man answered.
"Bring them as well!" answered the CEO as he headed for his limo.

They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says:
"Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."
The CEO replied, "No problem, the grass at my home is almost a foot tall."

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