Marketing in female terms
People often ask for an explanation of "Marketing." Well, here it is:
You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him
and say
"I'm fantastic in bed."
That's Direct Marketing.
You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One
of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says
"She's fantastic in bed."
That's Advertising.
You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his
telephone number. The next day you call and say
"Hi, I'm fantastic in bed,"
That's Telemarketing.
You see a guy at a party, you straighten your dress. You walk up to him
and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his
tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say,
"By the way, I'm fantastic in bed."
That's Public Relations.
You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says
"I hear you're fantastic in bed"
That's Brand Recognition.
You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk
him into going home with your friend.
That's a Sales Rep.
Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.
That's Tech Support.
You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be
handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof
of one situated towards the center and shout at the top of your lungs
"I'm fantastic in bed!"
That's Junk Mail.
You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him
and say
"I'm fantastic in bed."
That's Direct Marketing.
You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One
of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says
"She's fantastic in bed."
That's Advertising.
You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his
telephone number. The next day you call and say
"Hi, I'm fantastic in bed,"
That's Telemarketing.
You see a guy at a party, you straighten your dress. You walk up to him
and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his
tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say,
"By the way, I'm fantastic in bed."
That's Public Relations.
You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says
"I hear you're fantastic in bed"
That's Brand Recognition.
You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk
him into going home with your friend.
That's a Sales Rep.
Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.
That's Tech Support.
You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be
handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof
of one situated towards the center and shout at the top of your lungs
"I'm fantastic in bed!"
That's Junk Mail.
Two Italian Immigrants
A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit
down and engage in an animated conversation.
The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first,
but her attention is galvanized when she hears
one of the men say the following:
"Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more.
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed swine", retorted the lady indignantly.
"In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"
"Hey, coola down lady". said the man.
"Who talkin' abouta sexa?"
'I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella "Mississippi".'
BET YA READ IT TWICE!!
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